Friday, August 20, 2004
The rules for men
I found this list of rules for guys at the website http://www.liquorwits.com/code.html. The entire list isn't the cleanest, but I've picked some of the more amusing, more appropriate ones for my blog. I'm not sure if these are correct or not so feel free to leave a comment if they aren't.
1. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.
2. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.
3. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
4. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.
5. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your best friends birthday is optional)
6. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.
7. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.
8. Friends don’t let friends wear speedos. Ever. Case closed.
9. If a buddy has lint, an eyelash, or any other foreign object on his hair or face, under no circumstances are you permitted to remove it. However an appropriate hand gesture may be made to make him aware of it.
10. If you accidentally touch or brush against any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident, and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.
11. A man's shoes may not intentionally match any other article of clothing on his body.
12. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. (Exception: Rocky V)
13. You have not made any mistake if you find that there are extra pieces after reassembling or assembling an object. In fact, you have just found a way to make that object more efficient.
14. There are is never an occasion in which any shirt without buttons may be tucked in. (Exception: when you are participating in a organized sporting event)
15. Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught
16. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil.
17. The guy who wants something the most is responsible for getting it.
I found this list of rules for guys at the website http://www.liquorwits.com/code.html. The entire list isn't the cleanest, but I've picked some of the more amusing, more appropriate ones for my blog. I'm not sure if these are correct or not so feel free to leave a comment if they aren't.
1. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever! Unless you actually marry her.
2. Unless he murdered someone in your immediate family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 24 hours.
3. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
4. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.
5. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your best friends birthday is optional)
6. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.
7. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.
8. Friends don’t let friends wear speedos. Ever. Case closed.
9. If a buddy has lint, an eyelash, or any other foreign object on his hair or face, under no circumstances are you permitted to remove it. However an appropriate hand gesture may be made to make him aware of it.
10. If you accidentally touch or brush against any part of another man below the waist, it is an understood accident, and NO apologies or any reference to the occurrence is necessary.
11. A man's shoes may not intentionally match any other article of clothing on his body.
12. No man shall ever allow anyone to speak ill of The Simpsons or any Rocky movie. (Exception: Rocky V)
13. You have not made any mistake if you find that there are extra pieces after reassembling or assembling an object. In fact, you have just found a way to make that object more efficient.
14. There are is never an occasion in which any shirt without buttons may be tucked in. (Exception: when you are participating in a organized sporting event)
15. Any object thrown with reasonable speed and accuracy, MUST be caught
16. A man shall never help another man apply sun tan oil.
17. The guy who wants something the most is responsible for getting it.
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